Stop #12: 71st & Binford, Indianapolis (#142)

Stop #12 in this quest ended up being a stop just off Binford Boulevard in Indy, on March-24-or-March-25-depending-on-how-you-look-at-it.


Sadly, for the first time, Brett had to miss a trip. He wasn't feeling well.

So it was just me and Molly.

It was also nearly immediately following the Bulldogs' victory over Wisconsin. Thus the "GO BU!" on the sign.


They not only went to the Sweet Sixteen, they won their game there. So there was cause for excitement.

Of course, Molly and I don't get as much time to hang out and talk anymore now that we're not roomies, so in addition to talking about how adorable and awesome some ALL of the Butler basketball players are (over cheese fries and a Cherry Coke for Molly and a fish sandwich and fries for me), we got to catch up on such awesome topics as "Glee," vacations and the TSA, and, last but not least, how today is Thursday, and tomorrow is "Friday, Friday, Friday."



That is to say, we talked about Rebecca Black and this song she did that is pretty much atrocious. Though I'd like to make clear, I don't really think she's so awful, as the people at Ark Music Factory who actually wrote the song and then sold it to her for production. I actually kind of like her for saying she would donate the proceeds from the sale of the song to Japan relief efforts. Kinda makes me want to buy the track, even if all I do is drop it in my recycling bin afterward.

Plus, if you ask me, worse things have happened to the music industry. See: Ke$ha. See also, about 300 times more: Kim Kardashian. And as far as popular music goes, I would almost put Rebecca Black on par with Enrique Iglesias and his most current music -- both have melodies that are infectiously catchy with words that make you want to kick puppies. Seriously, now that I think about it, I might actually be more irritated with Enrique Iglesias right now, because the lyrics to such current hits as "I Like It" and "Tonight" are only moderately better than the lyrics to "Friday," but the music itself is even MORE infectious. I hate those lyrics and actually like those songs, so I'm forced to find myself driving along in Daisy St. Patience and singing along with "My girlfriend's out of town and I'm all alone, your boyfriend's on vacation and he doesn't have to know" and "Baby I like it! The way you move on the floor. Baby I like it! Come on and give me some more."

And damn. Now I have Enrique stuck in my head. That's exactly what I need right now ....

Other than the negative topics discussed Thursday night, I really enjoyed the Steak 'n' Shake on Binford. As least, the layout of the building. In part 'cause it seems to have some remnants of what inspired the "In Sight Must Be Right" slogan they've got. The bar is super-long and set up so that you can see them back there cooking, if you want. Even though we didn't sit where we could see them cooking our meat (or the non-meat, in my case), it was cool to look at the area.


And so we concluded the night with the "group pic" (containing all two of us) in front of that bar. Bonus points, we got the server and cook in the background, apparently.

Stop #11: Plainfield (#251)

Stop #11 took us the Steak 'n' Shake in Plainfield on Saint Patrick's Day.


The day before, I got new coupons for Steak 'n' Shake in the mail. I was super-excited about them, until I got to the Steak 'n' Shake and looked at them more closely.


¡Tristeza! They are coupons for breakfast. Damn it. I will have to get up early enough to get the all-you-can-eat pancakes that I don't want because the only good pancakes are the ones made by my dad by a campfire.

Brett, too, was sad that there were no coupons for him to use. So I made a special one, just for him.


In my defense, Brett said he wanted a coupon for jumping in front of a moving truck. So that's what I made. Which he apparently did not really want, as he crumpled it up moments later.

It was a good night, 'cause for once we didn't have to go at 1 in the morning when I got out of work -- we were on Spring Break and I decided to take some vacation.

We ordered (onion rings with honey mustard and a somewhat disappointing strawberry milkshake for me), and as we waited, Emily and I did some knitting.


This is not the first time I've been crafty at Steak 'n' Shake. Once upon a time (in May 2009), I met up with some friends from Purdue's marching band at the Nora Steak 'n' Shake when they came down to do the parade for the Indy 500.

Me sewing in the Nora SnS, circa 2009.

I was trying to finish sewing a cover to a CD case. I eventually finished it and it's probably my favorite travel CD case. Granted, the only alternative I have to it is a hand-me-up plastic case, decorated in purple and butterflies and designed to look like something brought to you by Lisa Frank. Still, I like my skulls-and-roses CD case very much.

Sadly, I don't think I'm as good at knitting while hanging out at steak 'n' Shake as I am at sewing while hanging out there, at least not yet. Maybe because with sewing there's that incentive of not stabbing myself with a needle that will actually draw blood. Knitting needs simply aren't as dangerous. After all, when I was eight and my grandma got concerned that I lost, somewhere in the house, a needle she had let me borrow to work on a project, it wasn't a knitting needle she was concerned I would step on and then have go directly into my blood stream which would eventually take it to my heart and kill me dead.

As a result, I got distracted by Brett's killer teddy bear game on his cell phone.

And by "killer teddy bear," I mean teddy bears that kill. Not killer in the "these teddy bears are AWESOME!" sense. Though I guess that teddy bears that kill are pretty awesome in their own right -- right?

While Brett used teddy bears to kill ... other teddy bears, I guess? ... and Emily knitted, and I got distracted, Nathan and Josh were busy too.

Apparently they were texting each other. I really hope they weren't sexting. Though, I guess if they were, at least they weren't doing it while they were driving. That's probably dangerous on TWO levels.

It was a fun night, and we were out of there before it was technically Friday, for once!


Although apparently most of us should have been pinched for not wearing green.

Stop #10: Post & 25th, Indianapolis (#255)

Our tenth stop in this quest was yet another late-Thursday-night-early-Friday-morning trip, March-10-March-11. Brett, Kate, Molly, and I got together, and picked a location to go to.


However, it was not the location listed in the above photo. We decided to go to the location on Pendleton Pike.

Unfortunately, yet again, the information on the Steak 'n' Shake website was wrong, and though that fact had previously worked for us in Brownsburg and Auburn, this time it did not. We showed up to the Pendleton Pike location expecting it to be open, as the website indicated that it was open 24/7. Instead, we were greeted by a locked door and signage on the door indicating that they closed at midnight. Bitches.

So we turned to Brett's GPS and asked where the nearest Steak 'n' Shake was.

And so we headed off to Post & 25th.

Yes, at roughly 2 a.m.

You're allowed to yell at me. So far Fiancé has, his cousins have, and a handful of other people have. You, too, are allowed to yell. 'Cause the Steak 'n' Shake on Post is SKETCHY.

But we'll get to that story in a moment.

Because we didn't realize how sketcy it was, when we first arrived. At first, it was all good fun times.

Brett and Molly were happy.


Or at least behaving normally, and as they had when we all used to live together in the Anhydrous Cove.


And Kate and I were happy.


We got food, which was by and large normal.

See example of normalcy, Kate's drink:


And the fish I had to get because it was technically Friday.


This is an example of slightly less normalcy because, really, who puts two pieces of fish on a sandwich and calls it a fish sandwich? Don't they normally come with a single fish patty, and we accept it because we no longer even question whether or not the meat (or in this case, by Catholic standards, non-meat) had to be processed to appear in that unnatural shape? I mean, chicken rings. Chicken nuggets. Actually, I think it's mostly a variety of chicken products that people question ... at any rate. My fish sandwich came with two pieces of fish, lettuce and a tomato. The tomato was pretty disappointing.

I also ordered onion rings with honey mustard, as well as fries, because I am a bit of a lardy. 'Cause I know Sean's curious, on that food thing.

So we were having a grand ol' time at the Steak 'n' Shake, chatting about zombie ants (really) and prenatal medicines (unrelated, as well as not specifically relevant to any parties at the table), when the trip got scary and I became concerned we may be witnesses to an actual crime.

'Cause Molly threatened to kill Brett via stabbing.


No, actually, that's not really what happened. And Brett clearly cared so much even if it did really happen.

What happened, was, some guy came in to the Steak 'n' Shake for a carry-out order. Somehow, he got into an argument with the guy working the grill. This argument involved loud voices, many choice four letter words, and an "I've got a knife, and I'm not afraid to use it!"


Sorry Molly, but I don't think he meant that kind of knife.

Before the guy came in, Brett and Kate had been waiting on Tammie (our server) to come back so they could order a couple of shakes to go. Then the carry-out-guy and the grill guy got in their argument, and we all collectively decided that maybe we should wait on shakes and we should just get out of there.

Then carry-out guy got his food, and he left. And then the grill guy took off after him. And we made a collective decision to just sit at the booth a bit longer until someone came back in, so we wouldn't be witnesses to ... whatever potential event was about to go down outside.

Frankly, we were terrified.


And yes. In our terror, I stopped to take some pictures. You're not REALLY surprised, are you?

The grill guy eventually came back in, and we headed out, assuming that it was safe.

(Yeah, yeah, I know. Post Road. I'm lucky the assumption only made an ass out of u and me, and didn't result in at least one of us returning riddled with bullet holes. Don't worry, we're not going back.)

As we left, Tammie split our checks and commented, "Didn't think you'd get dinner and a show when you came in tonight, did you?"

I'm not sure, but I don't think Steak 'n' Shake employees should feel obligated to give us a show, especially if that's the kind of show they have in mind.

And this is what will be known as the "We survived!" picture. See? We survived. And also, now we know better than to go to the East side at night. And unarmed.

Stop #9: Greenwood on 31 (#32)

This was totally not planned, but the store number for Stop #9 following the store number for Stop #8 makes a palindrome! Seriously. Go look at the last post.


Stop #9 happened Monday night, March 7. Or, again, really really early Tuesday morning, if you want to get technical.

Which I may want to do in this post, because that would sort of explain my pseudo-"Fat Tuesday" behaviors at the Steak 'n' Shake in Greenwood, on 31.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Because the first thing I wanted to say in this post is that the Greenwood stop has probably been the best stop so far, in terms of the Steak 'n' Shake itself being exceptionally awesome. Our server was a woman named Kathryn M., and she actually seemed excited to see us when we walked in. So excited that I was forced to wonder if someone had leaked our quest to her before we showed up. Which actually wouldn't have been a bad thing. I actually hope that as we near the end of this quest, people at the Steak 'n' Shakes we have not been to yet may actually know we're coming, if not exactly when, at least that we will.

Of course, her excitement may have had nothing to do with our quest. It may have been partly due to the fact that no one was in the place when we walked in, so our appearance meant she would actually have people to talk to.

At any rate, Kathryn made the trip more fun than Steak 'n' Shake is all by itself. She was excited by the box of crayons I was toting along with me (all 148 of them!) and happy to get me an extra placemat or two so we could make the sign and have some spare paper as well, uses to be determined later.

And as we complimented the fact that this Steak 'n' Shake was playing some awesome old-school diner music, similar to what you'd hear in a Johnny Rocket's, compared to the pop we've heard at most Steak 'n' Shakes so far (nothing against pop per sé, it just gets a bit old sometimes), and then started to talk about current music in general, Kathryn made an awesome comment, which my friend and our newest guest for the night Zach decided to tweet.


And Kathryn's comment? "Lady Gaga is a musical genius, while Nicki Minaj is more of a crack baby."
Zach is also awesome for his hashtag on this particular item. #epicsteaknshakeservercomment

At any rate, Kathryn was awesome. So awesome that I almost wish we weren't on this quest to go to all the Steak 'n' Shakes in the state, 'cause I'd like to go to the Greenwood one again.

I decided to try something new, again, on this trip, and ended up ordering the Guacamole Steakburger (and, of course, fries).

And it was actually really good. I'm going to have to get it again, and recommend it to others. Although, if you don't like guacamole, well, you probably won't like the Guacamole Steakburger, no matter how many praises I sing.

While we ate, we used some of that extra placemat paper that Kathryn brought out to do the story game. We haven't played in a long time, in part because we usually don't have enough people to play, and in part because Brett has no soul and hates this game. I made him pretend to have a soul, just for Monday night. Though I forgot to mandate that he pretend to not hate the game, too.

And for those who want it, the story:

Once upon a time, Brett drove Zach, Marcy, and Nathan to the Steak 'n' Shake in Greenwood. And himself, of course.
Talks of small penises and hummers commenced.
Then Marcy started this stupid story which made all the pandas in the world fall into deep depression, thus the panda ward was used in downtown Fort Wayne.
Then all the marsupials started attacking kittens; chewing kitten paws and putting said paws in their pouches. After feeding, they stared inside the windows of Steak 'n' Shake, awaiting Marcy's entrance on her world tour.
"What up New York!" Marcy cried in excitement, picturing herself in a concert in Madison Square Gardens.
Marcy's band filled Madison Square Gardens with the sensual sounds of Barry Manilow as she stepped up to the mic to hit her first thundering note.
As she stepped up to the mic she saw one of the poor Panda's she drove to suicide and decided that she would never make anyone suffer again with her stupid stories (i.e. raspberry ice cream).
No sooner had she stepped up to the mic, than the marsupials swarmed the stage. Kitten paws bombarded her from every direction. She began to cry as those marsupials climbed up her body and brought her to the ground.
And Jesus wept.

Okay, so the game is a bit more fun when you have more than four people. But I'm okay with this story, as I clearly died in the end.

Speaking of me dying ....

Since it was the wee hours of "Fat Tuesday" when we were at the Greenwood Steak 'n' Shake, I had Lent on my mind.

Steak 'n' Shake did not help, what with putting this placemat right in front of me:


But, on the plus side, at least I know there are options when I go to Steak 'n' Shake over the course of the next 40 days. I could have either the Fish Sandwich, OR the Fish Plate!

Ah, Catholicism. You are so tasty.

I already had Lent on my mind, though, when we arrived at the Steak 'n' Shake, because I had already made up my mind to give up chocolate this year. I've done it before, so I know it's doable, but I haven't done it in a few years, so I knew it would be a bit of a challenge for me.

But I also knew, from previous experience in giving up chocolate, that the best way to get myself through 40 days without it is to pretty much overdose and nearly kill myself with it right before Ash Wednesday.

And so, once I was done with my Guacamole Steakburger, I beckoned Kathryn to return to me.

"Bar wench," I said, because I decided I was now living in the 1500s and it was totally appropriate and not questionable at all for me to call Kathryn a "wench" despite the fact that, as I pointed out earlier, I actually liked her, "bring me the finest mead and honey cake you have!"

Of course, by "finest mead," I meant a chocomazing shake. And by "honey cake," I meant fudge brownie sundae.

That's right. I was going to eat them both in one sitting.


This, my friends, is my look of determination. This is a look that says, "Oh yes I can! I can and I will!" This is a look that says, "I know what I can handle, and I can handle this!" This is a look that says, "Brownie, Shake: You are going DOWN."


And this is the more light-hearted look, the one that says, "Brownie, Shake: You are going DOWN. But don't be scared. You are going DOWN ... and into my belly. But don't worry! It's warm and cozy there."

It's also the look that says, "I don't even need a spoon to take you out. I can take you on my own!"

Unfortunately, the picture that would logically come next, I can't show you. Because it happened the next morning, as I experienced my chocolate hangover that resulted from finishing the brownie yet only getting two thirds of the way through my chocomazing shake. I didn't get that picture because -- well, frankly, if you've ever had a hangover, you probably realize that capturing that Kodak moment is just not your priority. But if I had captured that Kodak moment, you'd be seeing the look that says, "I made a mistake." The look that says, "I have many regrets in my life, and last night was one of them." The look that says, "My name is Marcy, and I am an idiot."

And a look that, nearly drowning out all the above, moans, "Uuuuuuggggghhhhhhh."

I do feel that the hangover comparison is appropriate. I have had a hangover before. Only once, after a night in which I finished three quarters of a fifth of pineapple rum in under an hour. Stupid decision? Yes. But not the point I'm making here. For many months, I could not handle even the smell of pineapple following that hangover, let alone the taste of it. And we're not just talking my friend the Cap'n, in pineapple. We're also talking that slice of pineapple that Steak 'n' Shake sends out on top of its cottage cheese. The pineapple you find in a fruit salad. The pineapple in the pineapple upside-down cake. The thought alone would make me lose my appetite.

And my friends, when I woke up Tuesday morning, after my night of debauchery with this brownie sundae and chocomazing shake (a night in which that shake, for once, bested me), I didn't want to eat anything chocolate. I didn't want to look at anything chocolate. I didn't want to think about anything chocolate. And when I unfortunately did, I was left feeling so sick that I couldn't eat. Tuesday, I ate a whopping 390 calories. Well, between waking up, and going to bed (we're obviously not counting the Steak 'n' Shake trip in that number.) I couldn't find anything appetizing, let alone the chocolate that so tempts me most of the time.

Mission: accomplished.

Mission 2 will also be accomplished if I can manage to drop a few pounds, too, by thinking about chocolate any time I start to feel hungry and thereby suppressing that hunger to the point that I never have to eat. But that would be just a bonus at this point, as the primary goal -- to make myself not even want chocolate for most of the Lent season -- has already been fulfilled.

And so ended another successful Steak 'n' Shake trip. Which shouldn't have surprised me -- after all, going in, I knew this was stop #9. It was clearly destined to be awesome.

Stop #8: Washington & Holt, Indianapolis (#23)

Steak 'n' Shake trip numero ocho happened a mere two days after trip numero siete.



On this fun adventure, Brett and I were joined by Fiance and our good friend Jaydeth.

See me 'n' Fiance. Me being happy, him being "Look I'm on something really strong even if I can't name what it is!".

He wasn't really on anything. He just likes mocking me and my happiness. Too bad for him, he's going to have to deal with this happy FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE. Ha ha ha ha. I will get the last laugh. Because women on average live longer than men.


And, of course, see Brett and Jaydeth. I promise they don't always look this uncomfortable. Well, Brett does. But that's because you'd be uncomfortable too, if you were wandering around with no soul and all.

Actually, her name isn't really Jaydeth, but that's what I like to call her, and as a result, that is what Fiance really, truly thought her name was. We learned him right this weekend though, and told him that "Jay" is, in fact, NOT short for "Jaydeth."

Also, Brett and Jay would like you to know that, at Steak 'n' Shake, there are four meal options under $4 each.


That's right! A whole four options! All of them for less than $4!

Of course, by less than $4, what they really mean is, for $3.99 plus tax. But still! How awesome! Brett and Jay are here to show you how awesome.


Fun fact: Apparently at the Washington and Holt location, water is carbonated and has a vague lemon-lime taste.

Or, it could be that their servers get confused between which pitchers hold water and which ones hold Sprite. And that they somehow don't notice when they bring out two cups of "water" that are fizzing in ways water probably never should.

While at Steak 'n' Shake, we decided to play a fun game that one of my student workers shared with me. It's called "Exquisite Corpse," and rules are that you fold a blank piece of paper in thirds. The person to go first draws a head on the top third, then folds it back so that the next person can't see it. The next person then draws the midsection of a body, and folds it back so that the final person to play can't see it, either. The final person then draws the lower body, legs and all, then the masterpiece is unfolded so that all can see the full picture.

Meet Janey, our Exquisite Corpse.


No, I don't know what's with the clown pants there (I'm responsible only for Janey's head).

Of course, the clown pants started as chaps, which resulted in conversation regarding Janey's potential to have certain genitalia that would be ... exquisitely exposed, in such pants.

And this conversation, of course, resulted in AWKWARD STARFISH.

Sidenote, Alicia, creator of the AwkwardStarfish -- we miss you! As you can see, Jay clearly cannot AwkwardStarfish as well as you can.

After we'd finished with Janey, my Fudge Brownie Sundae showed up. And it was tasty. And this paragraph probably seems a little out of place, but I don't know where else to work in the information "I ordered a Fudge Brownie Sundae on this trip" without sounding potentially more out of place. I mean, I guess I could have said, "Sidenote, Alicia, creator of the AwkwardStarfish -- we miss you! I ordered a Fudge Brownie Sundae on this trip. And as you can see, Jay cannot AwkwardStarfish as well as you can."

And so ends another Steak 'n' Shake trip in the quest. Jay, it was good to have you, and if you didn't live in Illinois, we'd have you more often. Sadly, you've been tainted by that state, so away we must send you now.


Also, the lighting in the Steak 'n' Shake on Washington and Holt is clearly off. I swear there was writing on that sign ....

Stop #7: Southport Crossing, Indianapolis (#249)

Stop #7 in the quest brought Brett and me to the Southport Crossing location on Thursday night, March 3.


Or Friday morning, March 4, depending on how you look at it. Personally, I don't count a day as ended until I've actually gone to bed. But I may be cheating in that regard.

It was just me and Brett for this particular excursion. And I got excited pretty much immediately when we walked into the building, because the Steak 'n' Shake on Southport Crossing has the "In Sight Must Be Right" slogan right over the counter at the front of the restaurant.

Really made me happy.


It was a pretty quiet night, so I decided to jazz things up a bit when it came to the food order. As you've probably noticed, if you have read much in this blog, I usually only order one of a very limited number of items on the menu. The Frisco melt has never let me down, and so I often go for that when I find myself in SnS, regardless of which SnS it is. Similarly, chicken strips, always reliable. Of course, cheese fries, also good, or just fries but with their seasoning salt. Grilled chicken salad -- actually, that one did let me down once. The last time I was actually sick, it was definitely the grilled chicken salad I'd had at the Steak 'n' Shake the night before. However, for all the times I've gotten the grilled chicken salad and had a grand experience (that's right, a grand experience), to have it be a negative experience just once -- I'm willing to take the risk again in the future.

(Of course, someone needs to remind me of this the next time I get food poisoning from a grilled chicken salad at Steak 'n' Shake, when I curl up into the fetal position on my bathroom floor because I'm afraid to crawl too far from the toilet should the urge to heave come up.)

At any rate, Thursday, I decided to shake it up by getting something new.

So I gave a shot to ... the Cheesy Cheddar Steakburger. And a junior M&M milkshake which, believe it or not, I have also never tried before. Blame it on my years of working at McDonald's and having free access to the M&M McFlurry.

And I gotta say, I wasn't three hundred percent pleased with it all. The milkshake was good enough, but the sandwhich was only all right. The cheddar definitely made it messier than it needed to be, and flavor-wise did not make up for that fact.

The fun thing is, the coupons I've got definitely make me more inclined to try new things, I've realized. Because, at a certain point, I run out of coupons for $3.99 Frisco-Melt-and-Fries. So I may be trying more things in the future.

Sadly, if I'm going to be utilizing coupons a lot (and let's face it: 70 Steak 'n' Shakes in a year, and I'm going to need to. I've got a decent job, but it's not THAT decent. And I've got a good second job, but it's not THAT good.), I need to start remembering to bring along my scissors. I forgot them Thursday night, so thank God Brett had his pocket knife.

See? Totally not kidding here.

Following my slightly disappointing Cheesy Cheddar Steakburger and totally pleasing fries, Brett ended up ordering a Fudge Brownie Sundae, mostly because I talked about how I'd had one at home basically every day for the past week due to my craving at the 71st and Woodland location that was never fulfilled.

This was fine by me, 'cause it meant I got a cherry.

Brett took this picture, and I love it because it's like a scary 3-D movie. I mean, really, doesn't look like I'm about to reach out of the photo with my extended Steak-n-Shake shake spoon and scoop the nose right off your face?

The exciting thing about the Southport Crossing trip was that it officially marked us being 1/10th of the way done with this venture.

I was pretty thrilled with this. After all, we've got a tenth done already! Seven, done! And only 63 to go!

Of course, Brett, being ever pessimistic and angry and bitter, had a different perspective on this milestone.

This is his "What? We still have 63 to go? We've only got seven done so far?" face. And, of course, underneath it all, anger. Lots of anger.

Still, I remain optimistic, and left the Southport Crossing Steak 'n' Shake in good spirits. Seven down and only 63 to go. And, I'd like to point out, with a tenth of them knocked out and us having been at this only since February 4, we will clearly finish this quest well within our year parameter, maybe even before the calendar year itself is out.

I apologize for photo quality there. Our server has apparently never used a camera before, 'cause Codee the Canon makes it hard for anyone to screw up a photo, even me. Yet here, she did.

Stop #6: Auburn, Indiana (#345)

Less than 24 hours after our quest brought us to the Brownsburg Steak 'n' Shake location, the quest brought us to the Auburn location.

The Brownsburg and Auburn locations have something in common. Two somethings, actually. But they have nothing to do with Gordon Hayward. In case some of you readers were excited to hear more about him -- I'm sorry to let you down. (And, in the more likely case, in case some of you were sick of hearing about him, I'm trying not to scare you off -- though I'm disappointed that you're sick of hearing about him. I mean, really? Did you see that face? Did you see that awesome basketballing? Did you go find that rap and listen to it? HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY BE SICK OF HIM?)

The Brownsburg location and the Auburn location are both the sole locations in their respective towns. Brownsburg has exactly one Steak 'n' Shake, and Auburn has exactly one Steak 'n' Shake.

I know, that part's not that thrilling.

The part that IS thrilling, is that the Steak 'n' Shake website was incorrect in its listing of their open hours.

You see, the website lists that the Brownsburg location closes at 3 a.m. on weekdays. Which simply isn't true, as our waitress told us Thursday night. They're now 24/7, as all good Steak 'n' Shakes should be.

And at Auburn, it says closing time ("one last call for alcohol so finish your whiskey or beer ...." Speaking of, seriously, why does Steak 'n' Shake not serve alcohol? I swear I'd eat SO MUCH MORE there if they did. And Steak 'n' Shake would, believe it or not, BE EVEN MORE FUN!) is midnight on weekdays. But the manager there told us that they've actually gone 24/7, too.

It was like winning the lottery when it comes to finding out good news related to Steak 'n' Shake. I mean, two of them now open 24/7 that didn't used to be? GLORIOUS.

At any rate.

So we discovered fun information on the sixth Steak 'n' Shake stop.


Which, the sign reminds you, was in Auburn. In case you forgot. Already.

It was a really fun trip, because we had many guests join us.

For example, there was Adrianne, who went to BU with us, but is from Auburn and now lives there again and who used to work at this particular Steak 'n' Shake, which is why she felt so free to grab me a placemat with nothing on the back so that I could make the sign you see above.


She was happy to join us. Or happy that she and Brett had just come from the Applebee's across the parking lot, where she had been partaking in some adult beverages. Of course, then someone had to point out that Steak 'n' Shake itself does not serve such adult beverages. Then she and Brett BOTH got sad, which is weird, 'cause Brett never gets sad. Only angry.


Actually, it kind of looks like they're praying. Which you actually are allowed to do, contrary to some rumors that I saw discredited on Snopes.com.

Speaking of prayer, I found out while at this stop of the Steak 'n' Shake quest that one of my friends and another guest we had at this particular Steak 'n' Shake is now ordained! Yay! This is exciting to me, 'cause I'm starting to worry that my church's priest is never going to okay me and Fiancé to get married, meaning we will have to draft someone else to do it, and hey Sean, have I ever mentioned how you're, like, the best ever, and, like, my favoritest person ever, and how I heart you dearly and sincerely, and you're, like, the best ever, for reals?

Seriously, though. Sean said he does a Ninja wedding ceremony, the details of which I will not reveal here but which I promise are awesome. I may intentionally ditch the priest for that, not gonna lie. Hey Fiancé, can we have my friend marry us in a ceremony that incorporates ninjadom?

Our final remaining guest at this Steak 'n' Shake stop in this quest was Tim. Tim is probably someone who needs a nickname of some form in my life, because I have about a thousand Tims too many, now that I think about it, and this Tim is currently the only one going nicknameless. Seriously. I have my younger brother Tim, who is listed in my phonebook as Not-So-Little Brother. I have my Little Sis in my (coed) band service sorority from my undergrad years, Sister Tim. Shortly after Sister Tim joined Tau Beta Sigma, another Tim joined our brother organization. He was, of course, dubbed Brother Tim. My dad has a fishing buddy named Tim, and thus he is Fishin' Tim.

And of course, there is Waiter Tim. How could we ever forget Waiter Tim? Be still, my heart!

Which brings us right back here, to Steak 'n' Shake, and my dilemma of needing a nickname for Tim.

Also, because I very recently watched an episode of "Scrubs" in which Janitor gives JD hell for not knowing anyone's real names in the hospital and only knowing the stupid nicknames he has assigned to them himself, I would like to defend myself and that my system is nothing like JD's.

First off, the nicknames I give are not stupid. I mean, seriously. "Waiter Tim" versus "Snoop Dog Resident." Who wins? I'll tell you who. Waiter Tim. And not only because he makes makes me want to take him into a dark alley and do naughty things to him that would get us a rating of at least a PG-13 if we were to star in a movie. And "Colonel Doctor" versus "Not-So-Little Brother"? One is a nickname that could be taken as an insult, based on an episode of "People's Court" I watched today in which the plaintiff brought a witness who had been insulted in the incident in question when a customer-type-person called him, the witness, "Colonel Sanders." The other is a crafty crafty twist of words based on the fact that sometimes "younger brother" and "little brother" are terms used interchangeably, yet my "little brother" has not been littler than me since we were knee-high to a grasshopper. When we stood on each other's shoulders. Which we had to do because, as my college band director once pointed out, we come from a family of Lilliputians.

Second off, I actually do know everyone's real names in this situation, so back off. Their real names are Tim, Tim, Tim, Tim, and Tim.

Seriously, I do know all their names, but will refrain from posting them because hey, there is such a thing as privacy. Unless you're Facebook friends with me, in which case, everyone already knows your name already (it's like "Cheers" over there), and they know where you live and have seen where you sleep.

Just kidding. If you're on Facebook, you don't even have to be friends with me to have your privacy trampled. It comes with the territory!

At any rate. Adrianne and Brett were clearly too sad for being in a Steak 'n' Shake, so me, Sean, and Needs-a-Nickname Tim (and no, that won't be the nickname) showed them how excited you're really supposed to be when you're in a Steak 'n' Shake.


Okay. That might be a little TOO excited. But give us a break, the shakes had just arrived!

While we were at the Auburn Steak 'n' Shake, we saw a woman who looked frighteningly similar to the Maternal One. (Note: Yeah, I actually gave my mom a nickname too. I'm weird. Sorry.)

I had to pretend I was taking a picture of Brett in order to get a picture of her.


Seriously. A close-up for you doubters out there:

Ahhh! It's like the Deanna Doppleganger!

Except the Maternal One doesn't normally have such an expression on her face.

Of course, me taking pictures of Brett in order to get pictures of Deanna Doppleganger in the background led to Brett being angry at me.


Ah. Now THERE'S the Brett we all know and love. Or, you know, know.

And so, after a blissful treat of french fries and a cookie dough milkshake (for me, anyway), Steak 'n' Shake Stop #6 in our quest Around the State in 70 Steaks, and Shakes, came to an end.


We all headed out our separate ways. With most of us driving right past this sign, which I chose to get a photo of because, hey, you haven't seen any exterior shots in here yet anyway, have you? Save for those depicting Weather of Mass Destruction? And besides, this is right next to I-69, which is an interstate I've come to know and love in the past several years, 'cause it always takes me home. Also hate and despise, 'cause it also, inevitably, takes me away.

That bitch.